Tuesday, August 03, 2004

I'm sorry to announce....

I took the piss yesterday and suggested that people only write trivial things in diaries such as how they missed the train. Today, I am going to complain about just that. Or rather, not just that because today my train never even showed up. Apparently there was a flood somewhere, and then someone got hit by lightning, which meant the trains were the latest I have ever seen them ever. If, like me, you live in the UK, you will be familiar with those irritating pre-recorded announcements that apologise for the tardiness of the train. They go something like "I'm sorry to announce that the - four - forty-five - South West Trains service - to - London Waterloo - has been - delayed - by approximately - nine - minutes. I'm sorry for the delay to this service".

He can't possibly be sorry - 'he' is a recorded message.

Anyway, the announcements get progressively more and more apologetic. Today, when the train was delayed by over an hour and a half, our friend with the stilted speech had the courtesy to say that he was 'extremely sorry for the severe delay to this service'. Too right.

People of Great Britain! Why do we put up with this? We wouldn't just sit there shaking our heads if our TV told us the ten o'clock news would be shown at midnight due to 'the late arrival of another programme'. Nor if our microwave suddenly informed us that 'this meal has been - delayed - by approximately - eight - minutes'. Ridiculous.

Man! See what I mean about how boring diaries are? Hopefully these are just teething problems, and I will get my butt in gear to write about something more interesting very very soon.

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